“The eyes are the windows to my soul…the feet are the doors through which I enter”
Not only does reflexology touch the body, but it also touches the emotions – which takes me deep within my soul.
Whenever I deny myself the feeling of expressing an emotion, I believe that that feeling will move into my physical body and remain there, until eventually it is expressed.
Not quite a year after I was born, my mother was diagnosed with Hodgkinson’s Disease. She lived with this illness for 5 years, and at the age of 40 she passed – leaving a husband and 3 young children.
Not until the last year of her life, was my mother even aware of what was happening to her. In the 50’s it was believed “helpful” not to share with a patient the prognosis of cancer.
Out of genuine care and concern, my father also made the choice not to share this with his children.
However, even at the young age of 6…I could “feel” something.
Coming from an Italian family, and knowing what Italian funerals were like (very dramatic), my father made another choice – not to allow his children to attend.
It may have been just a few days before my mothers death; when my sister, brother and I were taken to stay with a relative. After the two day funeral was over, the 3 of us were brought back into our home, and then told what had happened.
I can honestly tell you, that I have no recollection of feeling anything at the time. A part of my soul knew what had been going on with my mother, but not to of had the chance to have closure…must have frozen my ability to feel myself.
I know what you’re thinking, “How did you feel about your father doing this to you and your siblings?”
Throughout his life, we talked openly about this. He felt trememdously guilty. Yet I realized that he had made these choices, in order to protect us from pain – which in reality, was “his” fear. His intentions were human.
As child, I had always had a very close connection with my mother. So as I matured, I continued to feel the comfort of her spirit close to me.
Throughout my adulthood, I was fortunate enough to have been lead to alternative holistic modalities, which enabled me to revisit my childhood and then gradually process buried feelings. And as with any process, you going through periods of moving deeper and deeper within the soul.
About 10 months ago, I discovered more feelings that were ready to be expressed.
This is where reflexology comes in.
One evening before taking a shower, I sat on the edge of the bathtub using a foot scrub. I remember pressing my thumb into the center of my right foot (which is the solar plexus reflex point).
The solar plexus is the center of emotions. It is were “feelings” are assimilated.
I had my eyes closed, enjoying a feeling of deep relaxation….when suddenly, within a split second flash…a feeling of intense sadness weld up inside me. It felt like a memory that shot up from the deepest part of my soul. Somehow I knew, that this emotion was coming from the mourning of a death, a death of someone who I had loved very much.
I saw a vision of myself as a child, kicking and screaming at the top of my lungs, grieving for a loss that was unbearable…and begging God, “How could you take this from me?!?”
It felt as though my whole body was breaking into a million pieces.
Then as fast as this came up and out of me…that’s how fast it ended – it took no more than 10 seconds.
In the following days, I began to feel lighter and freer.
Being ultra-sensitive to energy, I realize that as a child, I had unconsciously taken on the pain for my family…yet neglected my own.
This experience reminded me, just how deep reflexology can reach inside – allowing forgotten memories and emotions to be expressed and then let go.
It is a sacred ancient art…which opens the door to the soul.